Bài văn ngắn tả bố sau 3 năm đọc lại vẫn không… ngậm được mồm

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LBC – Ngôn ngữ trẻ thơ vốn ngộ nghĩnh, đơn thuần, sáng trong như chính tâm hồn của bé. Chính vì thật thà quá, trẻ thơ quá, khi đọc văn các bé, người lớn mới cười… không ngậm được mồm vì lời văn tả thực bằng thứ ngôn từ ngộ nghĩnh hết sức. Và bài văn tả bố mà cậu nhóc 8 tuổi từng viết cách đây gần 3 năm chính là một ví dụ.

Bài văn ngắn tả bố siêu hài hước
Bài văn ngắn tả bố siêu hài hước

Xin được dẫn nguyên văn:

Nhà em có nuôi một ông bố tên là Đỗ Mạnh Hà. Hằng ngày bố chỉ đi kiếm tiền rồi về nhà nằm ườn ra đấy. Đến bà là người to nhất vẫn phải làm việc còn bố là người duy nhất không làm việc. Lúc ăn cơm gọi mấy lần cũng chưa lên còn bảo đợi tao tí. Lúc ăn cơm xong cả gia đình cùng dọn, bố chả dọn rồi lấy điện thoại chơi Thiên Hạ Vô Song. Em bé thế còn phải đút xoài cho bố, từ nay em không làm ôsin nữa. Em rất yêu bố vừa vừa chứ không yêu lắm.

Bình thường, cấu trúc của một bài văn khi tả người, tả vật nào đó nghiễm nhiên gồm 3 phần: mở bài (giới thiệu nhân vật cần giới thiệu, kiểu như nhà em có…), thân bài (cụ tỉ hóa về cái nhân vật được nêu trong phần mở bài, kiểu như con mèo nhà em là giống mèo tam thể, có 1 đầu, 4 chân, hay đi lang thang tán gái…) và kết luận (chốt lại về nhân vật chính vừa giải quyết và/hoặc tha hồ nêu cảm tưởng, cảm nghĩ, kiểu như em ghét con mèo nhà em lắm, em thần tượng mẹ em nhiều…).

Nếu học sinh tiểu học nhận được đề bài dạng này mà cụ thể là tả bố của em, học thế nào, các em cứ việc bám vào cấu trúc triển khai là xong. Nhưng hay ở chỗ, ngôn ngữ trẻ thơ ngộ nghĩnh, chân thực vô cùng. Các em chưa biết trau chuốt câu từ, hành văn óng mượt mà viết theo kiểu nghĩ gì viết nấy, nhớ thế nào, hình dung ra làm sao thì tuôn ra bằng ấy. Thế nên đọc văn của tụi nhóc, người lớn thấy thật đến buồn cười, thẳng đến hài hước.

Cậu nhóc viết bài văn ngắn tả bố trên đây dùng từ ngây ngô một cách đáng yêu, nào thì “nuôi một ống bố”, rồi “nằm ườn”, lại còn đem cả câu cửa miệng “đợi tao tí” của bố mình vào không hề kiêng nể. Yêu thì là yêu, với nhóc thành “yêu vừa vừa chứ không yêu lắm”.

Thêm một điểm hấp dẫn của bài văn là nội dung bé tả không phải dập khuôn máy móc theo công thức: bố em bao tuổi, làm nghề gì, to cao, răng trắng cỡ nào, em tự hào về bố… Ngược lại, cậu chàng bê nguyên hình tượng ông bố thường ngày vào bài thi. Đáng tiếc là ông bố này có vẻ hơi… “mất điểm” trong mắt bé. Vì sao nhỉ? “Bố chỉ đi kiếm tiền”, lười làm việc nhà, gọi mãi không chịu ra ăn cơm, còn “ép” bé làm… ôsin “đút xoài” cho mình chơi game nữa chứ…

Rõ đây là bài văn “nói xấu bố”, giọng điệu vừa yêu vừa trách nhưng bảo đảm bố bé mà đọc được cũng khó lòng nén cười và chẳng nỡ lườm nguýt bé đâu, có chăng chỉ có thể là lườm… yêu thôi, nhề bạn nhề? 😀

Cá rán chấm Mắm tôm

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